In October of 2016 when my husband of almost 24 years left, I was devastated. I’d come home from my youngest son’s football game to find that our house had been partially emptied. Knowing that I had arrived home, he sent a text, “I’ve started moving out.” While we never had a fairytale marriage, I did believe we shared the same Catholic faith that meant divorce was NOT an option.
I was a wife and a stay-at-home homeschooling mom for our entire marriage. I had just had foot surgery a few weeks prior to his leaving and wasn’t supposed to walk on my foot. Yet, here I was having just gotten my first part-time job in almost 24 years and not sure exactly how I was going to make ends meet. I soon found out that the joint bank accounts had been drained, money moved to accounts he set up in his name only. As the days turned into weeks, I found out that he had stopped paying bills in my name for several months prior to his leaving so that he could stash the money needed to afford his new life. I was removed from the car insurance on the 18 year old, barely running car that I was left.
The legal drama took over a year and a half to battle through. The stress was unbearable at times. I lived in an almost constant state of fear, not knowing what my future held. Thankfully, I KNOW who ALWAYS holds my future. But y’all, I am human and had many times of doubt! That’s why I’m blogging now, I want to share with you the GOOD NEWS — God is bigger than your ex-spouse!
My about page isn’t where I’m going to go into all the details of my recovery from his leaving, but if you are hurting, scared or confused, I want you to know, without a doubt, that God has it all under control. He is preparing a better place for you– a place that you will soon look back from and say, “WOW! This is a far better life than I could have ever imagined, Lord! Mighty are your works! Thank you for protecting me and preparing this better place for me!”
Y’all, my ex took nude videos of me without my knowledge! He tried to blackmail me in more ways than one and tried to financially devastate me. He tried to kick me out of our home, took the better of our two cars, lied about his gun being stolen and tried to turn my own 88 year old father against me! God protected me! He provided miracle after miracle day after day. He can and WILL do the same for you! We serve an awesome God who is truly good all the time!
Over the years, I have come to see this betrayal of our marriage vows as a blessing. It may seem strange to say it is a blessing, but without this deep loss, I would not have seen the MANY miracles God provided to me and my boys the last years. I have grieved the loss and have begun building a new life — a better life. I have embraced my new singleness and used this time to draw closer to God and to become a better person–a healed, whole person. I am not sure what my future holds as far as love and remarriage, but I know that whatever God’s plan for my life is, His Will is perfect. I know that I must be a healed, whole person before ever entering into a new relationship!
I am not sure where this blogging experience of mine will lead, but I am trusting that God will lead it somewhere! No one may ever read a single post, but if a single soul reads what I have written and finds hope, comfort and renewed faith and trust in Jesus, then this experiment will be worth it.
I am a daughter of the King. I am beloved. I am chosen. I am saved. I’m human. I’m real. I’m snarky. I’m a work in progress. I’m a little crazy. I’m witty. I curse like a sailor when I am mad, but I don’t use the Lord’s name in vain. I hope that visitors will find hope and laughter on these pages.